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MWSA Review
Unlearning What Worked: Stories About Success, Stagnation, and Change by Matthew James-West is a short collection of autobiographical stories that show we must sometimes change the way we deal with things in life. The author is self-deprecating enough to win readers to his thoughts, solutions, and results. The book encourages us to examine our lives for our unwritten rules that are causing us to stall, whether in relationships or career. Each chapter addresses a different “rule” that sometimes needs to be abandoned for our greater growth. For instance, his early life taught him to become invisible to avoid pain and bullying. Later, as an adult, he had to change that defense mechanism. As he wrote, “…it marked a shift for me, from surviving quietly to leading visibly, and from hiding behind competence to building trust that flows both ways."
The author doesn’t proclaim that his experiences are a pattern for others to follow. Rather he gently encourages readers to examine their own unwritten rules to determine if it is time to change. Those who are looking to change will find many things to mull in this book. My favorite pearl of wisdom is his caution to “ …give each other grace and assume good intent until proven otherwise."
Review by Betsy Beard
Author's Synopsis
Unlearning What Worked is a collection of lived stories about trying to be a successful human in a world that keeps changing the rules.
For much of my life, I relied on the tools that once kept me safe: staying invisible, avoiding risk, following the rules, and doing what was expected. On paper, those strategies worked. The career progressed. The responsibilities grew. From the outside, things looked successful.
But over time, those same tools stopped working. Growth slowed. Satisfaction faded. The paths that once felt reliable began to feel constraining instead of protective.
These essays trace moments from my life where progress required letting go of what had previously worked, and learning to adapt without a clear playbook. They are stories about leadership, failure, stagnation, and change. About discovering that success does not always come with fulfillment. And about becoming more intentional, honest, and present in the life I was building.
This is not a guidebook or a set of prescriptions. It is a reflective collection for readers who find themselves between versions of who they were and who they are becoming, and who are learning that growth sometimes begins by unlearning.
Format(s) for review: Paper or Kindle
Review genre: Nonfiction—Memoir/Biography
Pages/Word count: 81 / 14,980